Give compliments, because wow! you’re doing a great job!

There’s a concept that says those who give lots of compliments are just gold diggers; they don’t mean what they say, they just want to “butter you up”. However, although we might  distrust those kinds of people in theory, in more practice, studies suggest that giving compliments actually does improve how other people see you. By giving genuine words of admiration, you show that you care about them. If you say you like someone’s hat, for example, you aren’t just saying you like the hat. You are saying you noticed that they took the time to wear it, and in short, you noticed them.

Humans have a need to belong. Without companions, people die earlier, are more likely to commit suicide, and are more likely to resort to crime. So many of the stories we surround ourselves with, from TV shows or movies or books, deal with relationships to some degree because it is such a potent part of our lives. Also in those same stories is usually a protagonist, picked for some special reason. This protagonist is set apart somehow, overcomes obstacles,  and although they may have difficulties with those they love, have some semblance of a family at the end of the day. We like this trope because we want to see ourselves in that way; we want to believe that despite our faults, we are special and loved.

Even if you don’t mean it, compliments implicitly give that sense of belonging and uniqueness. Putting in effort to notice a person helps the person giving the compliment and the one receiving it. It puts both giver and receiver in a good mood as well, which improves creativity and makes us more generous. Essentially, there’s no good reason to not give compliments. It’s a small thing that can impact you and those around you for the better. So take this chance! You’re going to do a great job!

 

 

 

 

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